Impulses are not Debt

Impulses are not debt.

One of the greatest lies ever to plague humanity is that impulses are kind of account balance, and if you pay them down every once in a while, you can keep them under control.

It seems like an okay idea, in the short term. If I have the impulse to eat ice cream, and then I eat ice cream, I'm free from that impulse for a while. It seems that I've paid it down, and I'll be free until the balance has time to build up again.

But if every time I have the impulse to eat ice cream, I indulge (in order to pay off down my impulse balance, I tell myself), I will very soon find that not only do I weigh 30 extra pounds, but my impulse to eat ice cream is coming more often, and is harder to resist when it hits.

On the other hand, if I deny the impulse to eat ice cream each time it arrises, I will soon find that I crave it less often, and that I am more capable of resisting the craving. Indeed, I will find myself more free, my actions not being so dictated by my impulses, than I was when I was "freely" indulging my ice cream craving.

And I think this understanding of freedom can be extrapolated. I am only free to break a cinderblock with the side of my hand if I put in the time and effort to train myself to do it. Likewise, only if I spend the time to maintain a healthy relationship with my friend, will I be free to see what's really going on in his life.

These are natural consequences, and we do not question them. And yet somehow, we expect more freedom and with responsibility in other areas of our lives.